Our pastor, Peter Hong, preached quite the challenging sermon on Sunday about being "scattered" -- ie allowing God to change our hearts so that we desire to be in the place where we're able to do the most good, vs. feeling the most comfortable or happy. At the end, the worship team led a song called "The Stand", in which the chorus goes like this:
so I'll stand, with arms high
and heart abandoned
in awe of the One
who gave it all
I'll stand, my soul Lord
to you surrendered
all I am
is Yours
And I found myself, even as I was caught up in the power of the moment, unable to sing the chorus. Because I'm just not certain that it's true, or that I'm ready to say this to God. It's a big deal to tell the person who I'm attempting to make the Lord of my life that He can do what He likes with my life, and that I'm abandoned to Him. Is that really true?
Now, don't get me wrong. I think there are people in my church community for whom this is true. I think the Holy Spirit was present and working in that place on that day. I think He worked in my heart, for sure. But I think He was working to help me see that it's not enough for me to raise my hands and feel the surge of powerful emotion in church on Sunday. If I'm going to sing it, I for sure better be ready to LIVE it. And I don't even know what that looks like for me yet, let alone whether I'm willing to say it to God and mean it. It gave me pause, and I hope that we as lovers of Christ are approaching our worship each week in a thoughtful way. Because otherwise, aren't we perpetuating that wonderfully convenient frustration that the secular world often seems to hold about us?
Just a thought. Any one else?
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It's interesting, because I, too, took note of this song. I'd never heard it before, and I sat down right in the middle of it to write the chorus down. It struck me as beautiful, particularly the line about standing in awe of "the One who gave it all".
ReplyDeletePastor Peter said something in his message that resonated with me; he stated that our faith is based on tragic happenings (the death of Jesus) that ended in ultimate hope & redemption.
As I stood there, hearing this song about Jesus giving it all, I was overwhelmed with gratitude, and also a fresh perspective for my apparent "tragic" circumstances I was battling...
I walked into church tired, worn out, and questioning a lot of things.
I walked out still tired, still worn out, still questioning, yet able to whisper that I will STAND in the Power of the "One who gave it all..."
Wow...deep thoughts for sure! I have struggled with this in the past and to be honest, probably will again at some point in my life, but being at the point where you CAN say...yes Lord is amazing! I've never heard that song, but just reading the chorus made my heart leap...Amen and AMEN! Thanks for sharing with us, not everyone would be so honest and forthright. I'll be praying for you!
ReplyDeleteKristy